im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
