i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
