hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
