AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Randomize
