If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
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