I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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