am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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