Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Randomize
