i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
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