Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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