I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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