he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
