I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize