are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
