I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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