I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
