I'm going to rape someone's good day.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
