You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
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