return my video game
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
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