The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
