Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
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