So drunk, too bad you don't want this
just come out here and I will go home with you...
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
