What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize