hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
