9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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