I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
