I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
Randomize