i barfeds in our rink
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize
