I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
