I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
