ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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