Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
