Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
Randomize