Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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