i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
