Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
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Blood and glitter go together right?
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
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I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
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