Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
