thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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