Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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