That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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