I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Randomize
