Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Randomize
