New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
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