:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
