I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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