As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
