great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
