Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
false alarm, still single
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