yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
There's even glitter on my cock...
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