just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
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