This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Randomize
