I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Randomize
